Outrageous, raw, and painfully funny true
stories straight from the life of the actor, comedian,
and much-loved cast member of The
Howard Stern Show—with a foreword by
Howard Stern. When Artie Lange joined the
permanent cast of The Howard Stern Show in
2001, it was possibly the greatest thing ever to happen
in the Stern universe, second only to the show’s move to
the wild, uncensored frontier of satellite radio. Lange
provided what Stern had yet to find all in the same
place: a wit quick enough to keep pace with his own, a
pathetic self-image to dwarf his own, a personal history
both heartbreaking and hilarious, and an ingrained sense
of self-sabotage that continually keeps things
interesting. A natural storyteller with a bottomless
pit of material, Lange grew up in a close-knit,
working-class Italian family in Union, New Jersey, a
maniacal Yankees fan who pursued the two things his
father said he was cut out for—sports and comedy.
Tragically, Artie Lange Sr. never saw the truth in that
prediction: He became a quadriplegic in an accident when
Artie was eighteen and died soon after. But as with
every trial in his life, from his drug addiction to his
obesity to his fights with his mother, Artie mines the
humor, pathos, and humanity in these events and turns
them into comedy classics. True fans of the Stern
Show will find Artie gold in these pages: hilarious
tales that couldn’t have happened to anyone else. There
are stories from his days driving a Jersey cab, working
as a longshoreman in Port Newark, and navigating the
dark circuit of stand-up comedy. There are outrageous
episodes from the frenzied heights of his coked-up days
at MADtv, surprisingly moving stories from his
childhood, and an account of his recent U.S.O. tour that
is equally stirring and irreverent. But also in this
volume are stories Artie’s never told before, including
some that he deemed too revealing for radio. Wild,
shocking, and drop-dead hilarious, Too Fat to
Fish is Artie Lange giving everything he’s got to
give. And like a true pro, the man never
disappoints.
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